today today i went to the park. agaain. it was fun i guess but none of the other kids wanted to be around me. they said that i looked scary and i think i did because parents didn't want them around me either. rachel was upset because they were being mean to me but i told her it was okay.

my brothers and sisters follow me around everywhere. everywhere. i amsure that they don't look less scary with their hoodies and xs and circles and the red. but they aren't allowed to leave me alone or else they'll get in trouble because big brother will be mad.

i don't like eating that much anymore but they make me eat anyway. rachel says they poison it and to not let them control me because Daddy is the only one for me. where is Daddy? i haven't seen Him in a while. it makes me sad that He's not here because sometimes i can see Him standing outside making my brothers and sisters hide in fear and making me smile.

i am very pale. i looked in a mirror yesterday and rachel wasn't in it but i was. i look        empty